013 [ action -> video ]

[imthe_shit]

[ Right square in the middle of Cherrygrove City, Snake is staring down his Torkoal, Boss, who appears to have... something... in his mouth. It looks square-shaped, and it's glimmering somewhat in the sunlight. The old soldier takes a hesitant step forward. ]

C'mon, Boss... Don't do this.

[ Boss clamps his mouth tighter around the object, causing Snake to freeze up. ] No, don't! [ Aaand... gulp. The mysterious box is gone forever, swallowed by the large fire-tortoise. ]

....

[ Snake pulls out his Pokégear, creating a video post. ]

[ VIDEO ]

[ He looks a bit... nervous. ] Hey, uh... Say, hypothetically, that a Pokémon swallowed a ... hypothetical pack of cigarettes. Would that... hypothetical Pokémon be harmed in any way?

... Hypothetically.

Comments

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

No, sir. Not yet anyway. I thought I would ask if it was...y'know, a thing with them.

[video]

[imthe_shit]

I don't think so. When I had Marlboro, he didn't try to eat any of my cigarettes. You're probably safe.

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

_{[The photographer lets out a relieved sigh.]}

Good...My pokemon like to steal snacks once in a while but they've never bothered my cigarettes. I know some Pokemon have weird diets. Don't some of them eat rocks or something?

[video]

[imthe_shit]

Well, I know that Torkoals eat coal from specific caves and stuff. I haven't been able to track down any coal this time around since I was holed up in Mahogany Town for so long.

Maybe this time he'll actually get something good to eat... And no more cigarettes.

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

Makes me wonder what's even in the pokemon food that we give them...

[video]

[imthe_shit]

I try not to think about it.

They don't taste good, at least not for human consumption. [ SNAKE TRIED TO EAT A POKEBLOCK ONCE. IT WAS NOT A FUN TIME. ]

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

Yeah, you're right.

_{[Henry has also sampled...most available treats made with Pokemon in mind.]}

How do they stand that stuff?

[video]

[imthe_shit]

Maybe the fire types have burned off all their taste buds, and the rest just acquired a taste for it.

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

Heh, yeah...and the psychic types just make themselves think of something else.

[video]

[imthe_shit]

Exactly.

[ Heh. ] The electric types can't think straight from all those shocks, and the grass types just make it all smell and taste all flowery.

[video]

[no_ufo_ending]

That makes me wonder if grass-types just eat grass...and why this dinosaur of mine grows fruit on his head.

Man.

Pokemon are weird.

[video]

[imthe_shit]

Hheh. They sure are. [ Snake reaches for a cigarette, but then remembers that Boss ate the pack and he sighs. ]

... Guess I better go get a scolding. Catch you later, kid.