imthe_shit | [ action / backdated to November 29th ]

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[ action / backdated to November 29th ]

[ The tornado had finally stopped, and Snake had been able to leave the center, taking a look around. Downed trees, parts of roofs blown off... Kind of amazing the center had little to no damage.

He could see people working together with their Pokemon, already clearing the wreckage and putting the town back together. Looking upward, the old soldier stared up at the tower. ]

That thing's still standing, huh.

[ He'd seen it in pamphlets about Mahogany Town, since he had nothing better to read while he was holed up in the center. Amazing. It was still raining, though, and Snake didn't have an umbrella with him-- probably not a good idea to bring out Boss.

So, he wandered over to a nearby tree, one of the ones still standing, and leaned against it, patting himself down for a cigarette. He had his octo-camo with him, but he couldn't get the damn thing to work... Must have glitched somewhere along the way, so instead he was dressed in more casual wear. A black turtleneck, camo pants... This was his usual outfit from the last time he was here, too. Not to mention the bandanna around his forehead. ]

Hhn... Where the hell are they... [ Finally, he finds the pack and opens it, realizing there were only two cigarettes left. He frowns considerably. ] ... Damn tortoise...

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_{[Things had been complicated-- for all of them. There was no denying that. If Heather had known any of them before this place, maybe it would have been easier to pick sides. As it was, she'd been caught in the middle. It hadn't always been pleasant.]

[But she smiles, reaching up to pat the bandanna, herself.]}

You say that like you're surprised.

Like I'd ever throw 'em away.

[ He half expected her to be wearing Otacon's glasses, but he kept that thought to himself. ]

You look like a combination of three people. [ Heh. ] Looks good on you, though... Makes you look tough.

_{[She's been a lot of different people in her time. This wouldn't be the first time she's tried on new faces to try and escape something, whether it's her past or just plain fear.]

[Too bad Otacon's glasses weren't left behind (not that she'd wear those, they ain't her style), but at least she has one of his Pokemon.]}

Heh, well... I guess I'd be lying if I said that wasn't the aim.

_{[To look tough, that is.]}

[ Well... Time to move onto more pressing matters, like... What happened to Heather a few days ago. Snake furrowed his brow, taking a step back and frowning. ]

... Heather... We need to talk about the other day.

_{[Grin fading, Heather looks away, rubbing the back of her neck.]}

... Yeeeeaah... sorry about that...

[ He stares at her, long and hard. ]

What the hell was that?

It was...

_{[She trails off, reaching down to rub Cujo's ears as he sits down and flops against her leg, panting happily and totally oblivious to the awkwardness of the subject matter.]}

Well, honestly, it's really hard to explain. As you might imagine.

I guess the first place to start is... how much do you believe in the supernatural?

[ At the question, Snake thinks a moment. Vamp came to mind... And he didn't believe that Vamp was actually a vampire. He was only called that because he was bisexual, not because he had a vampiric nature. His abilities to climb up walls and the like were all due to technology, and his ability heal so quickly was due to the nanomachines in his body. Of course, Liquid having possessed Ocelot was an entirely different story... A ghost out for revenge, so to speak.

Snake shrugged a bit. ]

Depends. If it's right in front of me, and there's no scientific explanation, then I guess I have to believe it.

_{[She nods. It's perfectly reasonable. ... And besides... there was a good long while that she had herself convinced that there was nothing truly supernatural in the world. Even though deep down, she knew the exact opposite was true.]

[So she spreads her arms and gestures to herself.]}

... Wellp.

I'm right in front of you.

And there is literally no scientific explanation for the fact that I exist. Not even one that just has to be experimented for before people understand it.

Do you believe me?

[ Snake stares at her, long and hard. He really has no idea if he can believe her, but he can't think of any reason why she'd make something like this up. And really, Snake was no ordinary man to begin with, even if cloning was a lot more scientifically explanable.

The old soldier tilts his head a bit, looking her up and down. ]

I don't think you'd lie to me about this. But what do you mean there's no scientific explanation?

[ He frowns very slightly. ]

You're here... you're real enough.

_{[There are ways that Heather can frequently be dishonest, but she's not one for telling tall tales. ... Or at least not ones that are intended for people to actually believe, anyway.]}

'Course I'm real. This isn't one of those Shyamalan movies where the twist ending is that I was a figment of your imagination all along, y'know.

_{[She flashes him a cheeky grin at that, but then sobers up again.]}

What I mean is, my existence... it can't be proved by science. It has nothing to do with science.

If your average laws of reality were rigid and unbreakable... I wouldn't be standing in front of you.

_{[She'd be a charred corpse buried under the wreckage of a ruined building out in the boonies.]

[Of course, now that she's gotten that out of the way, she can't just leave it at that. Now she actually has to explain something to him. And decide WHAT and HOW MUCH she wants to explain. It's information she once trusted Otacon with, but that was years ago.]

[It's literally been years since she's told anybody about her past.]}

... Look, maybe we should sit down before I tell you more.

[ Snake didn't really understand. Well, how could he? He didn't really have anything to compare it to, but... He had to know. That strange zombie version of Heather he'd seen before... He couldn't get that image out of his head. Even if he didn't have to talk about it very much, it would still shadow his thoughts of Heather. He needed to know the truth.

But Heather was a good kid, she'd tell him everything in time, he knew. At her words, Snake nods his head. ]

All right. Good idea. Let's get out of this rain.

[ He gestures to the Pokemon Center, or the restaurant nearby. ] You lead the way, kid. I'll follow you.

_{[Normally, she's never in any hurry to divulge her secrets. But Snake already disappeared on her once. Getting someone you loved back is a gift that she knows better than to squander. So he'll be hearing it, even if it winds up just being a few scraps and pieces of it for now.]

[So she nods and starts towards the restaurant. A table is more private than sitting cramped in the waiting room with every other roving trainer who felt like getting out of the rain.]}

[ Once they're seated, Snake begins to idly look over the menu, though he's not feeling all that hungry. He glances at Heather over the top of the pages before setting the menu back on the table.

After a few moments, he clears his throat and rests his hands on the table's surface, bringing his fingers together. ]

So?

_{[She's not particularly hungry either. In fact, sitting down at the table sends a twinge of deja vu through her heart. ... Because man. Was it really two years ago that she sat down in a diner with Dale Cooper and told him the truth about her first life, and about the charred-looking, carousel-dwelling creature known as the Memory of Alessa?]

[It feels like yesterday and that... that hurts.]

[So she spends the first couple of minutes just rubbing her temple. But she can't just leave Snake hanging.]}

So.

... I guess I should... start with the fact that I wasn't always named Heather.

When I was born... my name was Alessa.

Alessa Gillespie.

Alessa...

[ That was a far-cry from Heather, most assuredly. Then again, Snake was a far-cry from David, but he had a feeling that she hadn't just chosen a code-name or something like that. ]

Didn't care for the name?

Well... it's complicated, but...

_{[Now there's a decision to be made. Because there's more than one reason that she's worn so many different names. One of them is fairly believable to your average layman. The other... not so much.]

[... Maybe she should leave the soul-splitting part for another day.]}

I had to change it for... safety reasons.

You know... so that no one from that life could find me.

A new start.

You follow?

... [ Snake remembered the events of the Tanker Incident, the Big Shell. Taking on a new name in order to continue operating in secret wasn't unknown to him. Iroquois Pliskin had still been an alias of his. ]

... Yeah, I get you.

[ He leans forward a bit. ]

You said before that the reason for why you exist can't be explained scientifically. You changing your name have anything to do with that?

_{[She's quiet for a moment, expression unreadable. She's deciding just how to break the news.]}

... Yeah.

Just now, I said 'that life'. Like I was referring to some other life than the one I'm living now.

I wasn't being symbolic.

_{[Here she leans back in her chair, looking him dead in the eye. Not blinking. She's not going to hang her head or stare into space when she says this.]}

Eighteen years before I came here, I died.

[ Snake's eyes widen at that, and he leans in a bit. ]

What?

[ That... certainly wasn't what he was expecting. ] How can you die eighteen years ago? You're not even that old... [ ... oh. It couldn't be reincarnation, right? That was probably the most unscientific explanation he'd be able to think of. ]

_{[She just stares evenly back. Heather isn't usually one to sound creepy, but right now, she kind of does.]}

I was born in 1976.

In 1983 I was seven and presumed dead. They never found the body because I wasn't. God help me, I wasn't.

In 1990, I was fourteen and finally got the opportunity to end it. Seven whole years after what happened.

_{[She's silent for a moment, and finally looks away.]}

I don't know if I got a funeral, or if there was even anything left of me. I'll probably never know, because like hell am I gonna go looking for details in old newspaper clippings or archives.

But at the very last minute, I had second thoughts. Thought maybe life was worth taking another chance on.

It was too late for Alessa. Even if she'd wanted to, there was no way to survive. Not after... everything that happened.

But before I was gone for good, I... _{[She looks down at her hands. It's hard to think of a way to explain that she magically crafted a legit baby around her soul and then sent it off into the world while her old eyes dimmed in death as Nowhere darkened around her and not sound completely insane.]} ... well. New start, right?

_{[Smiling wanly, she spreads her arms.]}

Here I am. Born in 1990, thanks to the everlasting miracle of freaky reality-altering brain-powers that let me pull a baby out of thin air. Memories in-tact, mostly. Not that there's much worth remembering.

'Least I made it to legal drinking age this time, right?

[ Snake returns her hard stare, not once breaking eye-contact, listening to everything he's being told. He keeps reminding himself that while Heather did lie at times, she probably wouldn't spout this kind of story and expect people to believe it... And he didn't pin her for being completely insane... So it must be the truth, even if it was absolutely impossible to believe.

But then again, his brother, Liquid, possessed a man by surviving on through a transplanted arm, so in that case, really anything was possible. He just wasn't sure if he should believe it or not.

Once she was done, he gives a bit of a smirk at her final statement and leaned back in his seat, looking out the window, finally breaking eye-contact. ]

At least.

[ He pauses a bit, thinking his words over carefully. Snake really couldn't imagine choosing to reincarnate, being able to remember a past life like that; it was just something he could never imagine happening-- to himself, or anyone else. ]

... So you remember your previous life, huh? [ He wasn't entirely certain what "it" was, and why it needed to be ended, but Snake had a pretty good idea that he wouldn't understand a lick of what he was being told, even if it was explained. ] If you were actually born in 1976, then... That'd make us only four years apart. [ That was... a little unsettling. ]

Yeah. I do.

There's times when it doesn't even really feel like a previous life. I pushed the memories away for years, but... in some ways they just sort of melt into each other.

_{[She pauses for a moment on that thought as well. Because yeah. It's weird to think about from an outside perspective. And it's something that almost didn't happen, all things considered... Alessa had been so determined to die. Only one thing-- one thing and a split second where she had a chance to actually make the choice-- had made her decide otherwise. It had been a big risk, one that potentially would have little payoff.]

[But little Cheryl's memories of a happy childhood had won out over Alessa's pain and desperation.]}

And yeah. S'weird, I know.

... But if it changes anything... the last seven years of that life barely qualified as living. _{[Figuratively AND literally. Seven years strapped to a hospital bed in a dark, dank basement room, being perpetually suspended at the very brink of death by unholy combinations of magic, medicine, and madness...]}

I might as well have died when I was seven.

And those memories... some of them... just felt like part of the second time around. I'd be six, and I'd remember something that happened years ago and think that it happened last week. Wasn't until so much later that I had to remember the truth.

So... even if I was originally born not that long after you...

_{[She rubs at the back of her neck, scuffing the heel of one boot on the ground.]}

... I still feel like a kid.

This is the first time I've ever made it this far. ... Survived this long.

[ Snake couldn't even imagine such an existence. This kid had led two lives? Or was it three? He didn't really know, couldn't fully understand since some things were being left out.

But what he did know is she had a terrible burden to bear-- a kid like her having memories from way before she was even born... Another life. The old soldier reached a hand forward, taking one of Heather's. He wasn't the best at comforting anyone, and he'd be a liar if he tried to make anyone believe otherwise, but he could see her discomfort, the expression on her face...

No kid should have to go through that. David thought of the words, tried to pick something to say... ]

You'll survive. You're a tough kid, I haven't met many like you... You're strong, you've got a lot of life in you. You'll make it through, you'll keep on living.

[ He stares at her, a hard gaze. ] I might not fully understand what you're going through, what it must be like... But I've never known any Alessa. That thing I saw... That wasn't you.

You're Heather Mason. A tough kid who doesn't let anyone tell her what to do, no one but herself. You've been through some shit, but you'll survive and come out tougher than ever. [ Shakes his head a bit; he can't really tell if he's being harsh or not. Not so great at the motivational stuff here. ] You can't control your past life... But you can control this one. Only you, no one else.

Edited 2014-01-04 04:38 (UTC)

_{[He may not be good at comforting-- it may be off the mark because he hasn't heard the whole story, heard the full extent of the horrors she's been through-- but you know what? It still means the goddamn world to her.]

[And the smile she gives him is warm, touched, and completely genuine.]}

Dave... thank you.

_{[What he's saying are mostly things she knows... but it never hurts to hear them again. Especially lately...]

[She puts her other hand on top of the one he's holding hers with, and grasps it firmly.]}

... That thing you saw... I know you think it wasn't me. ... And in a way, you're right.

It was a part of me that... well, fortunately, not many people get to see. Kind of like the ugly kid you hide when the neighbors come to visit.

_{[She speaks with a joking tone, but sobers up when she adds--]}

But it's still there. It's... something I made peace with a long time ago. A memory.

... Literally, I guess.

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MIND I'm just pulling these years out of nowhere since there's no original official canon dates.

<3

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